Delayed Gratification; A secret in getting what you want most.

So today I have decided to get over my mental writing block, (that spanned one week, into one month and now we are ending June) and just start. As with all daunting challenges, we get through them by just taking those little baby steps.

I can’t remember where I left off, but there are some big plans coming together at the moment. They say moving house and planning a wedding are some of the most stressful things in life. This year we are renovating the house, buying rental properties and planning a wedding. I can confirm, yes, it is stressful, but it will all be worth it.

Matthew and I often have our ‘put the world to rights’ chats when we are on long drives. I think we have both been feeling the relentlessness of what we have taken on lately, however, that is when gratitude and delayed gratification are the most important.

Be grateful now and also for what is yet to come.

We bought this house last year and are now a week away from starting the extension we visualised when we moved in. Matthew worked hard with the architect and we have been tackling all the jobs we can do ourselves.

When I saw the house I loved it immediately. Even though it was dated, I offered on it before Matthew had even seen it.

With all the big goals we set; it can be easy to forget that in July last year, all I wanted was to hear that my offer was accepted. Sometimes we get so caught up in striving for progress that we forget all the things we have now; that were the things we had wished for.

I want to enjoy this house and everything we are working really hard for. It will be where we start our married life and future family. That is why I am willing to ‘go without’ to get there.

Another big aspect of our year has been planning the wedding. There are lots of decisions to be made, but we have applied the same logic as we have with the house. What are we aiming for and how can we get there?

What are you willing to go without to get what you wish for?

In an ideal World, we would all just get exactly what we want, when we want it. But, then we would never appreciate the value of anything.

For some people, the goal is the car, or the clothes, the luxury lifestyle. My equivalent is my home. I’m not fussed by the car, but I know how I would love my house to look. Interiors and furnishings are my ‘Ferraris’.

We have ‘sacrificed’ holidays, date nights, new clothes, meals out, take outs, new phones etc to work towards our bigger dreams. Any profit has been re-invested, we save and budget. We have watched YouTube to learn how to lay flooring, I’ve learned how to make curtains; furniture has been upcycled and weekends have been spent in lofts, painting or digging up gardens. It is delayed gratification that will keep you going when things are tough, stressful or when you want to see instant results.

When I say sacrifice, I don’t mean ‘woe is me’. I do not believe that it is negative nor do I believe it truly is going without. It’s is the same reason diets fail, when we believe we are being deprived, but actually we are delaying the ‘instant want’ for the health benefits later. If we can change our thoughts from what appears to be punishment to reward, we can move past FOMO culture. (Fear of missing out).

What are you doing today that is delaying you achieving your goals?

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